Relationship advice givers are a dime a dozen. The problem is that most of the people we are listening to have no idea what they are talking about. If you ask how they make it work and they say something like, “well, he’s still breathing” RUN. Very fast, in the opposite direction.
I read a random blog not long ago that detailed this idea that marriage is the fire of life—that somehow it’s designed to refine all our dysfunction and spur us into progressive wholeness.
It said, “In this light, contrary to popular opinion, the goal of marriage is not happiness. And although happiness is often a very real byproduct of a healthy relationship, marriage has a far more significant purpose in sight. It is designed to pull dysfunction to the surface of our lives, set it on fire and help us grow. When we’re willing to see it this way, then the points of friction in our marriages quickly become gifts that consistently invite us into a more whole and fulfilling experience of life.”
That’s pretty genius advice. We all want great relationships with that someone special that we’ve chosen to live out our days with. Sometimes we expect only happiness though. That would rule out the nuances and spontaneity of a real relationship. Marriage can make you a better person, if you will let it but sometimes you have to walk through fire to get it.
Here’s some of my advice: